Kafkaesque

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There is one thing which is quite uncomfortable and gave me anxiety always. There are many, but here I am talking about my fever dreams. I am too lazy to search why these kinds of dreams occur for people when they suffer from a fever at night or when sleeping sick. Those dreams make me stressed and show pictures of me doing actions which are not quantifiable or performing and hearing things in loops. I want to end them when they are happening but they never ended. I heard the same from people who also experienced them. Though I barely remember many, I am trying here. Recently I experienced one in real life too, not sure whether I can categorise this one with those fever dreams I am talking about.

It is 2014, have a cold fever, it was early morning and I got this one. I was bringing big stones and filling someone’s house from the inside along with some known members in my reality. No matter how many stones and how big they are, the house didn’t fill up. The most uncomfortable thing is, my urge to find the biggest stone as fast as I can, and every time I found the bigger one than the previous one, in an endless manner. Even now when I think about it, it shivers me. I wonder if even Kafka experienced worse as much as this one. Few dreams revolve around the conversation that happened without an end, like a voice in a casual tone without inherent meaning in words. A few weeks ago, I went to an outfit shop to buy some cloth with my friends. He picks up every item and sees them. Suddenly the feelings that are sowed while I experienced those dreams came back like a petrichor.

Later I read some articles on this, and the experiences of a few people too. Anyway, I still believe life is more absurd than any of these things.